Nonexistent Mourning
by tovanell
Summary: -AU- An assassination attempt on ten year old Gaara is successful, and Temari and Kankurou mourn for the brother they never really had.
1. Chapter 1

Nonexistent Mourning

by tovanell

-AU- An assassination attempt on ten year old Gaara is successful, and Temari and Kankurou mourn for the brother they never really had.

* * *

Here's how it worked:

When it became clear that Gaara couldn't control the powers of Shukaku and grew a little more unstable every day, the experiment was called off and the Kazekage called for his assassination.

It started out a B-rank assassination mission – after, what can a six year old who doesn't have control over his powers do against an experienced chuunin or jounin? – but after that first attempt with the boy's uncle, Gaara suddenly gained more and more control over the sand, and became more and more deadly and unstable.

(The theory is that after the incident with his uncle and his emotional breakdown, Gaara gave in to the will of the Shukaku and became more in sync with the demon. The Kazekage wished they had found out about this earlier and used it to their advantage. But it was too late now.)

The ongoing mission turned into an A-rank and Suna began to lose many good shinobi.

The thing about the assassination mission was that it had to be carried out by Suna shinobi, in Sunagakure. Gaara was Suna's jinchuuriki and should be dealt with by Suna and only Suna. Calling for ninja of other Hidden Villages would reveal weakness and could be used against them. Plus, there was _utter_ humiliation in the fact that they cannot deal with their own problem and had to ask other Villages for help.

-Gaara was Suna's problem, theirs and only theirs-

Unfortunately, this meant that it was impossible to kill Gaara. They were in the desert, and Gaara controlled the sands with ruthless efficiency. The Kazekage wasn't willing to lose his best shinobi - the extremely talented ones or the ones with precious Kekkai Genkai, especially since they don't have many shinobi in the first place – and had to settle for simple good shinobi (_but not good enough)_ who got crushed by sand in seconds, maybe minutes if they were lucky. Gaara has also gained quite a reputation, and most feared him enough to turn down the mission when given it.

Gaara's weapon is the sand, but sand is still earth nevertheless. Suna shinobi have Wind or Earth affinity, but wind and earth techniques will not work against the sand, and there was not one Lighting user in the village.

The Kazekage realized this, and by Gaara's tenth birthday, he has ordered fewer attempts – once every two or three months or so - given the futility of it all.

Yet Gaara is still such a glaring problem, one that must be eliminated, _soon_. Even if it was mean sucking up their pride and asking for help.

* * *

The final strike came one day only a few weeks after Gaara's tenth birthday.

Maybe it was because someone or something provoked him. Maybe it was because the marketplace was so crowded and loud, too crowded and loud for Gaara. Or maybe it was because it was a full moon the night before, and Shukaku was more bloodthirsty than usual.

Whatever the reason was, Gaara had snapped at the Suna bazaar and went on a killing spree right in the middle of it.

The damage: Eighteen civilians dead, nine because of Gaara, the rest trampled to death by the masses of people running from the bazaar, away from the monster, fearing for their lives. Five shinobi dead, crushed to death by the sand when they had attempted to restrain Gaara. More than forty civilians injured from the panic and chaos.

The village was in an uproar. Angry civilians gathered in front of the Kazekage's dome, demanding that he do something, and finish off the demon once and for all. Angry shinobi, not daring to be so direct, did their jobs passive aggressively and half-assed-ly. The Council hid themselves in the meeting room, discussing over what the hell to do.

Amid the tense arguments and accusations and just plain bickering and bitching, one council member stood up, asked for them all to put aside their pride, and just called for help from another Hidden Village. It's a troubling move, and he doesn't like it himself, but desperate times calls for desperate measures, and Gaara needed to be killed before either he or villagers angered by his actions destroy the village.

There was intense and violent opposition, of course. It _was_ a hard choice: death by Gaara, or death by possible-invading-village-who-knew-how-weak-they-were?

The debate dragged on for the rest of the week, and by then, the mob outside was gone (except for a few hard-pressed ones, who were taken care of), but discontentment still ran high.

In the end, everyone was all just tired and desperate.

After they took vote and the meeting ended, the Kazekage went up to his office, and wrote a mission request to Kumogakure, the Village Hidden in the Clouds. They were, after all, in the Land of Lighting, and bound to have a few experienced Lightning users.

(Although he finally sunk low enough to ask for help, he still refused to do it outright and so directly. He wrote the request anonymously, making it appear like a random stranger who just wanted a certain redheaded boy dead. He sent the request anonymously as well, by foot carried by a chuunin disguised as a civilian.)

He wasn't at all happy, but it was for the good of the village.

Like always.

* * *

A/N: Love the Sand Sibs. Love writing as well. So here we are.

In the series, Gaara shows up, and he's seemingly unbeatable. Yet genin Rock Lee and Sasuke Uchiha are still able to crack that armor of his. They're awesome and strong like that, but if you think about it, a Leaf ninja like Kakashi could probably kill Gaara, if their genins are like that. So I think that while Gaara did win against every one of those assassins his father sent, they weren't that high-level. If Suna really wanted Gaara really dead, they would have found a way. In this fic, they did and they succeed. Then, sibling angst.

First fic. Constructive criticism welcome. I fail at tenses, but I aim to improve that.

tovanell


	2. Chapter 2

Nonexistent Mourning

by tovanell

-AU- An assassination attempt on ten year old Gaara is successful, and Temari and Kankurou mourn for the brother they never really had.

* * *

Gaara was not a genin or an official shinobi, not because he wasn't ready or not good enough – he was already past genin level and everyone knew it – but because his father did not see the point in promoting someone who was marked for death. He was still trained and tutored, because he was the Kazekage's son and the guise of normalcy was maintained, even if Gaara was a demon and his father still sent assassins after him every month or so and everyone knew this as well.

Gaara was not genin or an official shinobi, but he still got sent on missions with his genin brother and sister, because there was room on their team and they usually get sent on mission that involves killing a bunch of people really dead and really quickly – perfect for Gaara. To sate his blood thirst and to get something done, it's like killing two birds with one stone.

The mission was another massacre mission. There was an ethnic nomadic tribe on the steppes of the Land of Wind that had been causing trouble, raiding villages and challenging the rule of the Wind daimyo. The daimyo wanted the complete destruction of the tribe, all of them dead. The tribe's military might were skilled warriors on horseback, and there were about two or three hundred warriors – but they weren't shinobi. A large group of jounin might do the trick.

Gaara, along with Baki and Kankurou and Temari, was sent.

There was something else to this one mission, though. Like all their other missions, it's like killing two birds with one stone. Only this time, one of the problems solved will not be Gaara's blood thirst. It will be Gaara himself.

Only Baki knew. The Kazekage himself had told Baki what will happen and what he will do. Gaara, tired and chakra exhausted after decimating the whole tribe, will be targeted by a group of Kumo jounin, all specializing in Lighting techniques, right afterwards. It was unlikely he will survive. If he does survive, he will be most definitely injured and severely weaken, and Baki will finish Gaara off.

* * *

The warriors, with their flimsy armor and simple metal swords and wooden arrows and horses, didn't stand a single chance against Gaara.

Still, the sheer number of them overwhelmed Gaara with just his sand, so Shukaku came out and finished them all off.

After every last member of the tribe was killed, the nomadic village on the steppes torn up and utterly annihilated, Shukaku, satisfied, receded and Gaara woke up, dazed and disoriented and _exhausted_, both chakra-wise and physically.

They made camp a few good miles away from what's left of the tribe and rested for the rest of the night.

It's unfortunate things turned out this way, Baki thought, as he waited for the Kumo ambush. Gaara, who was sitting in front of the fire, staring off into space, actually looked somewhat like a normal ten-year-old now, small and quiet and tired, not one hint of killer intent in him.

At the crack of dawn, lighting struck through the clear sky and Baki sprang into action, grabbing Kankurou and Temari and ran, leaving Gaara alone to fend for himself.

For the good of the village, Baki told himself, as he ignored Temari's protests and set the siblings a good distance away: close enough to see everything that's happening, but far away enough to not be hit by a stray attack.

The three of them watched as Gaara, still dazed and disoriented and tired, take on five jounin at the same time, sand noticeably slower and the lightning attacks getting too, too close.

-The good of the village-

* * *

One of the Kumo-nin drew blood from Gaara – Gaara! – and Temari felt her own blood run cold.

Gaara has never been hurt before. The sand has always protected him, against anything and everything. Yet, even as she watched from a distance, she could see one of the Kumo-nin's lightning-lined blade go through the sand shield, through the sand armor and into Gaara's side. She could see Gaara jerk in pain, stumbling back and clutching at his side, red spilling over his fingers and blossoming over his clothes.

By now, she has realized this was another assassination attempt, only it might not be 'attempt' and could become just plain 'assassination'.

Gaara might actually die from this.

There is something scary about the thought, because Gaara _(Gaara and Shukaku)_ seem almost immortal, invincible. Gaara can go for a whole week in the desert without water, can go for whole years without sleeping, and can survive explosions and hundreds and hundreds of kunai. Gaara, who has never gotten a scratch on him, who had skin that was flawless and smooth, better than her own. Gaara, who seemingly cannot die, but was so close to death right now.

Temari stood and watched and felt a bit numb. Most of her is amazed and shocked, because Sabaku no Gaara, Shukaku jinchuuriki of the Sand, was being hurt, being killed, and she was watching how it will all play out. Gaara was dying, and she got to watch how. The rest of her felt something like _relief_, because Gaara was finally going to die, after all those years of fear and hurt that he had imposed on the village, on them.

Yet, somewhere, deep down, there was another part of her, this one small part, that felt…guilt and worry? After all, this was her little brother _(even though it didn't mean the way it should)_. This was her little brother who was being killed by assassins their father hired, and she was just standing there, not helping, doing nothing and just watching.

She looked at Baki-sensei, who was looking at the battle, face stoic but tense. She looked at Kankurou, who had collapsed on the ground, staring wide-eyed in disbelief.

Temari looked back, clearing her thoughts, and focused on the battle.

* * *

Gaara had retreated into his sand sphere, and the four remaining Kumo-nin – he had killed one already – surrounded it.

Temari knew that Gaara was trying to bring out Shukaku again. She knew, but the Kumo-nin probably did not, not from the way they still surrounded the sphere and tried to find an opening. Gaara was still chakra-exhausted, though, and she wondered if Shukaku could come out when Gaara was like that.

Once Shukaku appears, the fight will turn to Gaara's favor again, and he might not die after all. Shukaku, after all, was still a demon, a bijuu, and these jounin were still human.

One of the Kumo-nin, after nodding at the others, began to spin his sword, collecting lightning onto his blade, a giant mass of electricity at his hands. The air crackled and the lightning from the blade seemed to connect the sky to the ground, and the jounin charged towards the sphere.

Before today, Temari would have thought that was stupid, because Gaara's sphere is his absolute defense, one that nothing can penetrate, but now she wasn't so sure.

So she watched.

It caught her a bit by surprise when the man was able to avoid all those spikes that shot out from the sphere, and plunged his electrifying sword in, going through the sand – _he went through the sand _–

A pause, then…

The scream was inhuman, so, so loud and so animalistic sounding. She heard the human scream, but the Shukaku roar underneath it was louder, and it sent shivers down her spine.

Gaara's absolute defense crumbled and there he stood, in the middle of all that sand, hands clutching his chest, clutching the sword-

"The sword went through his heart…!" Baki-sensei next to her said, eyes wide and voice just barely a whisper and incredulous.

And it _was_ through the heart. The blade was poking out of Gaara's chest, and blood was gushing out of the gaping hole there.

Yet Gaara was still moving.

He yelled again, that inhuman scream again, and suddenly the sand shot back, at the man holding the sword, and in an instance, he was gone, consumed. The sword slid out of Gaara, who screeched in pain and collapse onto the ground, on his knees, still clutching his chest.

The wave of monstrous chakra and killer intent that exploded from Gaara was so evil and immense that the three felt it even this far away. Temari's legs went weak and she fell onto the ground, all the while forgetting how to breathe. She heard Kankurou throwing up somewhere on her left.

The sand spun around Gaara, and it looked like he in was in some kind of sand tornado when it exploded, flying out in all directions, consuming everything in its path and looking like a sandstorm. Too late for those Kumo-nin now, who didn't even have time to know what was happening. It spread across the grassland, fast and wild-

"Temari! Kankurou! Move!" Baki-sensei barked, as they watched the wall of sand moved towards them. Regaining their bearings, they shunshined away, heading for the forest at the edge of the steppe.

* * *

All around him was sand; He had transformed the steppes into a desert, destroying the vegetation and turning the dirt into sand, in his last – and successful – attempt to kill those damn Kumo-nin.

Gaara had no doubt this was all the Kazekage's doing. The mission was just to get him tired, less ready and alert, so he would be caught off guard and killed. But he had killed them all, like always, and he won again, yet-

His chest was burning – such horrible, horrible pain! And that was his blood on the ground around him, his blood that was gushing out, warm and wet and thick. It was his heart, his heart was pierced through, yet he was still alive, somehow, and Kaa-san was screeching in his head, loud and maddening and causing him as much pain as his heart, trying to heal him, keep him alive, keep them both alive.

But Shukaku was only the One Tail and didn't have the chakra to heal something like a _hole in the heart_ and he – they had already used up so much chakra…

The world spun around and around, there was blackness at the corner of his vision, and Gaara sunk into the sand. He felt cold, colder than on the coldest of the desert nights. Cold and lightheaded, the world still spinning around him, and the pain, in his chest, his heart, his mind, with Shukaku still screeching and clawing, made it impossible for him to think. He couldn't think, which might be just as well because he doesn't want to think, think about what will happen to him, because he had already realized-

_He was going to die. _

Gaara whimpered and fear _(how long has it been since he felt that, fear?)_ flooded his mind, crashing into the very core of his being. He was going to die and he'll be gone, his existence gone, vanished from this world, erased and forgotten. He'll die and back in Suna, they'll _celebrate_, rid of the relic of the past that they so desperately wished to forget, finally. They'll pretend he never existed, and he was going to disappear completely from this world.

Anger welled up and Gaara clenched his teeth, but winced in pain as a shock of pain shot through him. He coughed out blood, sour and metallic in his mouth. His blood.

Gaara was going to die, was going to disappear forever and he can't do anything about it.

_Kaa-san…Kaa-san, please…don't let my…_

_save me…_

But Mother wasn't there and there was only screeching, that maddening screeching in his mind, and she, _it_ was only worried about itself, fearing for its own life…

Gaara was going to die, and he was going to die alone.

He clutched at his heart harder, but he can't feel anything now, just numbness and cold and pain, still so much pain. He can't even tell if he was breathing or not.

_My existence…my life…me…_

_No…_

The world spun and spun, more black in his vision - he can't see anything now, not even the sand in front of his face - and he felt himself falling, falling…

Then it was silent,

completely, perfectly silent

and the world disappeared.

* * *

A/N: During their match at the Chuunin exams, Sasuke could have so easily hit Gaara's heart - Just a few more inches to the right, a few more inches in... It was that thought that inspire this, somewhat.

Gaara and Shukaku are _weird_, but that's what makes it so fun. Canon doesn't help explain much, sadly. He seems to know Shukaku isn't his mother, that it's a demon when he was info-dumping his past to Naruto and Shikamaru, but calls it that during his match with Sasuke. I personally think Gaara only calls it 'Mother' when he's really out of it, but otherwise knows. Then there's this whole thing when Gaara falls unconscious in the series (after the fight with Deidara), but Shukaku didn't come out. I'll put that off as chakra-exhaustion.

Feedback would be nice. Constructive criticism would be even better.

tovanell


	3. Chapter 3

Nonexistent Mourning

by tovanell

-AU- An assassination attempt on ten year old Gaara is successful, and Temari and Kankurou mourn for the brother they never really had.

* * *

When they came back to the steppe, there was only sand. The grassland was no more; no green anywhere they could see, just sand.

"He completely transformed the landscape…" Baki muttered, looking all around.

They walked through the newly formed desert, trudging carefully through the sand, heading in the direction where Gaara was. They were silent for a while, until Kankurou let out a shaky breathe and asked:

"Do you think…Do you think that he might still be…alive?"

Temari glanced at him, then at their teacher, but Baki-sensei ignored Kankurou, looking straight ahead and kept on walking.

"Sensei…" Seeing how Kankurou failed to get an answer, Temari tried. Baki-sensei ignored her at first too, but then he slowed down to a stop. The siblings glanced at each other and stopped too.

"…Gaara may seem unstoppable because of his sand, but sand is still earth. Lightning is naturally strong against earth, and we believed that if we could use Lightning techniques against Gaara, we might actually succeed. But, unfortunately, Suna doesn't have any Lightning users." Baki paused, turning around to face his students.

"After the incident in the Bazaar two weeks ago, your father, Kazekage-sama, had decided that Gaara was simply too dangerous to keep alive any longer, and decided to get rid of Gaara by any means necessary, even if it meant relying on foreign Shinobi." Baki paused again, grimacing, obviously still not liking the idea.

"Kazekage-sama hired a group of Kumo-nin for this latest attempt, Kumo-nin that specialized in Lightning techniques. He then assigned this mission to our team, because the attack had to happen outside the village, and in hopes that the extermination of the tribe would tire Gaara out, and make the assassination easier. He was right."

Baki sighed, looking at the two siblings. They stared back at him.

"When we find him, he should be dead. After all, he took a sword through the heart-" He was cut off when Kankurou snorted and looked away.

"He should have died the instant that happened, yet he was still moving. And got even stronger. That was freaky…" The puppet user shifted uncomfortably. "Gaara's not normal. He _always_ lives, and this time shouldn't be any different."

"…In any case, we wouldn't know unless we go find him. Even if he had survived, I doubt he's in a good condition…He should be severely weakened…" Baki trailed off.

"Kazekage-sama has ordered me to kill Gaara, if that was the case." Kankurou and Temari jerked their heads back to look at him, eyes wide and filled with worry and surprise. "I should be able to do it with minimal difficulties. But if anything happens," Baki shot each of his students a look, "_Run_."

"But-"

"That's an order. You two will run and take cover if anything happens." And with that, Baki turned and continued walking.

"Let's go."

* * *

The Kumo-nin were nowhere in sight, not even mutilated bodies or bloody patches in the sand, but Temari knew that they were undoubtedly dead. Instead, they found Gaara alone, lying on the sand and so, so still.

He laid on his side, half-sunken in sand, curled up a little, bloody hands clutching at his chest. There was so much blood – the sand beneath Gaara was soaked in it, and the white sash he wore was dyed red.

Gaara had his eyes closed, and with those dark rings around them, it looked like there were holes where his eyes should be. Blood trailed from his mouth down his chin. Even in death _(that's right…because he really was dead now)_, his face was blank, holding no expression.

They all hesitated when they within a few feet of Gaara, looking down at him, and stood there uncomfortably, not wanting to get any closer. Baki-sensei slowly drew out a kunai – best be prepared – and finally walked up to him. He knelt in front of him, carefully turning him over so that Gaara laid straight up, then felt his neck for a pulse.

For some reason, that one second was agonizing. Then-

"He's dead."

-And Temari let out the breath she was holding, while Kankurou beside her shuddered a bit.

Gaara, dead. After all those years, all those assassination attempts and dangerous missions, he was finally

-dead-

It was almost surreal.

Temari walked slowly up to the body, and knelt beside Baki-sensei, staring at her little brother's corpse. She took in the pale, pale skin, the blood-red hair, she took in his face and the hole in his chest, right where the heart was; she took in the blood-and-sand encrusted hands…

And realized how small Gaara was. He was skinny, scrawny, and his hands were smaller than hers. With him lying down like that, with his eyes closed and with him looking like he was sleeping (except for the all the blood and the fact that Gaara never slept), Gaara looked like a little boy, like a little brother and Temari remembered that he was only ten-years-old.

Ten-years-old and dead, assassinated by jounin hired by their father and killed by a hole through his heart…

_(When she was ten, she was still in the academy, her fan still too heavy for her to carry around)_

That numbness she felt earlier was still there, only now it was all there was, having blocked out her relief _(and maybe even a bit of sadness?)_. She didn't mind it, though, because she had no idea what she was _suppose_ to feel and didn't think she would want to feel any emotions right now if she could feel, so numbness and the lack of feeling suited her just fine. And, besides, she was a ninja, and ninja was better off not feeling anything at all.

"Baki-sensei." The jounin turned to look at her. "What should we do now? Should we clean off the blood or something…?" And there was just so much blood, mixed with sand. It all looked so familiar, only now it's Gaara's own blood and the sand was still and dead.

"No. That would be the coroner's job." Her teacher stood up and pulled out a scroll from his flak jacket. "This is a storage scroll for bodies. We'll seal him and go home."

Baki-sensei looked down at her, then at Kankurou, who still stood behind them, hands in his pockets, shifting a bit from foot to foot, looking weary and nervous.

"Are you two…okay?" Baki asked.

Kankurou grunted and muttered "Yeah", while Temari just nodded. She glanced at Kankurou, and he at her, and they both looked away.

"We're fine."

* * *

A/N: School sucks.

Sorry for taking so long, and for such a short and simple transitional chapter. I'm separating chapters by content, instead of length, so they will vary.

I really do hope that I have the characters in character...it's difficult. Temari, Kankurou, Baki... I really think they do care a bit about Gaara, but won't ever show it, or admit it. Plus, they're trained to not show - feel- any emotion, so getting their reactions is kin of tough.

Feedback and constructive criticism would be greatly appreciated.

tovanell


	4. Chapter 4

Nonexistent Mourning

by tovanell

-AU- An assassination attempt on ten year old Gaara is successful, and Temari and Kankurou mourn for the brother they never really had.

* * *

The trip back to Suna was strange.

For one thing, Gaara wasn't there anymore. Kankurou had been so used to flanking Gaara, standing, walking, doing everything behind and to the left of him, and now that Gaara was gone, it kinda threw him off balance. Just Temari next to him, Baki behind them, and this big empty space in front of him. Made him feel a little exposed too, somehow.

Another thing – you would think not having a psycho, homicidal demon-possessed little brother with you anymore would be relaxing. No more death threats, no more him worrying that Gaara would snap and just obliterate them without warning. No, if anything, he was more tense and more nervous. Not that he showed it. And underneath all that, he still can't believe that Gaara is _gone_ now. Dead. The only time 'dead' and 'Gaara' were in the same sentence was 'Someone was dead because of Gaara'.

Kankurou didn't remember much of the trip home besides those two things. He was distracted and tired, and just walked almost absentmindedly through the desert. He was still a shinobi, of course, so he was still aware of his surroundings and all, but he did that half-heartedly, mind kept wandering elsewhere. He doesn't even remember what elsewhere was about either.

He did, however, remembered with perfect clarity what had happened when they got home, when they got back to the gates of Suna, just him, Temari and Baki-sensei.

They checked in with the guards at the gate, waiting for the chuunin to finish writing down their names, the date and the time, when the man suddenly stopped, lifted his head up and looked at the three of them, each of them. Looked past them, out into the desert, searching for the fourth member of their group. Then looked back at them.

"Wha- Er, where is…?" They were always afraid to say Gaara's name. Like he would hear and suddenly pop up to kill them.

Temari didn't say anything. Neither did Kankurou. From behind them, Baki sighed.

"Gaara has been killed in action."

There. Again. Those words just didn't seem to register in Kankurou's mind. Neither had they registered in the chuunin's mind either, it seemed, the way he stared blankly at Baki for a few seconds, uncomprehending.

"Wha…" The chuunin frowned, going over those words. "G-Ga... Killed?" Disbelief on his face.

Then, a hesitant smile.

"Dead? He's dead? Seriously? He finally died?" The chuunin was all joy now, big wide grin, happiness replacing disbelief, so happy. It's almost disgusting, that cheerfulness.

Kankurou suddenly felt the urge to punch him hard, to rip that stupid, annoying grin off his face.

But he was controlling himself.

"Yeah, Gaara's dead, ja. Celebrate later; hurry up and let us go." Kankurou snapped, shoving his hands in his pocket and scowling. He glanced at Temari, who looked impassive, but her eyes were hard.

The chuunin nodded and quickly finished everything up, still smiling the whole time.

* * *

Word traveled fast. By the time they arrived at the Kazekage's dome, they were told to go to the morgue. The kunoichi that relayed the information kept her face blank, but you could tell she was happy too.

Kankurou wondered if he should be happy too. He probably _should_, because Gaara was finally _dead_, but he wasn't feeling it.

Before yesterday, he had liked the _idea_ of Dead Gaara greatly, because he was fucking tired of walking on eggshells all the damn time. A day without having to watch what he said around the little brat, without receiving death threats and feeling killer intent all the freaking time? Awesome.

But the reality was different.

They walked over to the hospital, through the doors, and down the stairs into the basement, the morgue. Kankurou grimaced at the smell – he has never been here before, because no one he cared about ever died.

_But here he was, because Gaara's one of the many corpses in here now. Did he care, at all? _

One of the nurses was waiting for them, and she led them to Autopsy Room 1. It was a large room, with an autopsy table right in the middle of it, and the lights shining above it the only lights in the room. The Kazekage was already there, standing off to the side in the shadows, while two medic-nin – the coroners – stood next to the table, waiting for them.

The Kazekage walked up to them. They saluted and Kankurou and Temari both stepped aside, parting way for Baki.

"I see the mission was successful, Baki. Were the Kumo-nin enough, or did you have to finish the job?"

"The Kumo-nin were enough, Kazekage-sama. Gaara managed to kill them all, but succumbed to his injures in the end."

"Let's see those injures, then." The Kazekage held out a hand, and Baki gave him the storage scroll that held Gaara's body. He walked over to the table, placed the scroll in the middle of it, and made a hand seal. A poof of smoke, and there was Gaara, small and bloody and dead.

The Kazekage wore his hat and mask, but his eyes were visible, and Kankurou could see the triumph in them. The Kazekage looked coldly down at the body, studying it for a good while before speaking again.

"Baki, you will tell me every single detail of the mission while the coroners," he said, eyes shifting to look at the two medic-nin, who quickly got to work, "clean up and examine the body."

Baki took a deep breath and began. Kankurou stood straight and still where he was, not listening to Baki, but instead watched the coroners handle his little brother's corpse.

* * *

The body laid on the table, blood and sand washed off, and naked except for a white sheet covering the waist and below. They all stood around it, listening to the coroners reporting their findings.

"The jinchuuriki sustained electrical burns on his arms and back, but they were only second and third degree burns and non fatal. He was cut deeply on his right side, damaging the organs there and resulting in hemorrhaging. And, of course," One of the coroners pointed to the hole in Gaara's chest, "the heart. The blade cut pierced through the right atrium and the right lung, while the lightning burned the tissue surrounding the blade."

"In a normal person, a the blade through the heart – with electricity lining it, no less – would have stopped the heart the moment it was impaled, and he would have died instantly. If not, then at least the shock would have made the heart go into cardiac arrest, killing him as well."

"But it seemed the jinchuuriki – the bijuu was able to prevent that from happening. We found new, chakra-enriched tissue already trying to patch up the heart. But the Ichibi isn't known for regenerative healing abilities, and so while it managed to keep the heart beating, it ultimately failed in the end."

"So, the cause of death was a mixture of excessive blood loss of the chest and the side, and the damage to the heart." The coroner finished, glancing towards the Kazekage for his response.

He only nodded, eyes still on Gaara, taking in everything. "Any other findings?"

"Well, it's…interesting to note that the jinchuuriki was malnourished. Nothing too bad, but he was obviously not eating well. He's underweight for a boy of his age." The second coroner spoke up, waving his hand over Gaara's bony ribs to emphasize.

At the corner of his eye, Kankurou caught Baki glancing at Temari and him, obviously displeased about them not noticing Gaara's self-starvation or something. Well, not like they could have _done_ anything. Gaara never ate with them at dinner, opting to raid the kitchen late at night when he got hungry, and Kankurou doubt anyone would bother to check if he's eating healthily or not. As long as Gaara could function, that was enough.

"Otherwise, there's nothing else. The sand did a good job protecting him until yesterday; there are no prior injures other than the…scar on his forehead." All eyes flicked to the kanji. There was an uncomfortable silence in the room. The other coroner broke that silence a few seconds later, cleared his throat and turned to the Kazekage.

"Kazekage-sama…Shall we prepare the body for cremation and the funeral…?" He asked.

"There's no need for a funeral." The Kazekage stepped back, finished here and ready to turn and go. "Just burn the body and throw away the ashes." With that, he left.

Kankurou glanced down at Gaara's body.

_No need for a funeral_

It was logical; fitting, really. The Kazekage hated Gaara, considered him a failure, a threat and menace to the village. And so did everyone else. Why waste money on a funeral for someone like that? If there was a funeral anyways, who would come? Besides happy villagers and shinobi who would just come to celebrate and cause trouble and make the _funeral_ pointless.

-Monsters are slain, their deaths celebrated-

Kankurou didn't feel like celebrating. He just wanted this to blow over, and then he and Temari and everyone else will go back living their lives. He realized, that Gaara's death really didn't impact anything. The boy stood aloof from everyone else, except when he got bloodthirsty and went to find someone to kill; he wasn't part of the village, never was, and now that he was out of the picture, Suna will just relax, forget, and move on.

Kankurou was sure he didn't care, because Gaara was Gaara, and he was creepy, vile and insane. He made it clear he felt nothing for them except murderous hatred, and Kankurou gladly returned the sentiment, albeit not as extremely or openly. Yet all of this felt _wrong_, even if Gaara was a demon. Wrong that Gaara was dead and no one cared, not even his own family; wrong that the village was celebrating, and that he was going to be cremated and toss in the trash.

And that wrong intensified when he looked at those pale, bony shoulders and the small ashen face _(and Kankurou could see the half-resemblance to their mother and that just made it worse)_ and he saw more of a little boy instead of the monster…

"Kankurou."

"What?" He replied, not missing a beat, but now his thoughts had broken off. He looked up and across the table at Temari and Baki. Both looked indifferent and he knew that his own face did too. No emotions, uncaring.

"We're leaving." Baki said, before glancing down at the body then back at Kankurou, "Unless you want to stay a little longer…?"

"Yeah, right." Kankurou scoffed, making his way around the table to join what's left of his team. "Let's go, ja."

Temari looked a tad bit annoyed at him, but otherwise didn't show any other emotions, won't let herself feel any other emotion. She was always better than Kankurou during emotional training, but Kankurou was an actor, and he can act his way through. He'll admit Gaara's death bothered him a little _(just a little, and mostly because his life has just changed, no any other reason)_ but he's not going to show it.

Behind him, Kankurou heard the coroners move the body onto a stretcher and the stretcher being wheeled out to the furnace. There was an urge to turn and look back, because this is the last time he was going to see Gaara, and after that, he was gone from their lives forever.

-He's never going to see Gaara again-

Temari looked, and so did Baki, just a glance, but Kankurou couldn't bring himself to. He sighed in annoyance and walked for the exit, Temari and Baki following him a second later.

* * *

A/N: I love Kankurou. He's just awesome. And his little accent is adorable. And I hope that medical stuff sounded believable. I researched, heh.

Funny you mentioned perspective, **Sincynati**. Here's Kankurou's point of view. He's fun to write; more emotional than Temari, which I try to show here. As for the italics and parentheses, it's a style I'm trying out. I do want them to be side thoughts, or the little distant thoughts you think without realizing it, but I'll look into that. Thanks a lot!

Hope you guys enjoy this latest chapter. And keep the feedback and criticism coming.

tovanell


	5. Chapter 5

Nonexistent Mourning

by tovanell

-AU- An assassination attempt on ten year old Gaara is successful, and Temari and Kankurou mourn for the brother they never really had.

* * *

The village was in a festive mood.

Look up and there was ninja leaping from rooftop to rooftop, in all directions, no doubt rushing home or wherever to announce to friends and family that the demon was gone. Small groups of chuunin and jounin gather in the shade of the arcade walkways and roads of Suna to gossip and exchange information. Bars and restaurants were filling up with people who felt the need to celebrate the news.

Before, when their team walked through the streets, with Gaara leading the way, it would be dead silent. Everyone on the road would slow down the pace of whatever they were doing, or stop altogether. Heads turned away from the Kazekage's children; eyes filled with fear and hatred darted back and forth between the ground and the three children, wanting to avoid looking at the team, at the demon vessel, but also wanting to keep a watch on them, just in case. Tension filled the air, everyone cautious and nervous, afraid that one wrong move or look will catch the attention of Gaara and hell would break loose.

Today, the streets were noisy, filled with laughter and chatter. Everyone seemed to be filled with energy and cheer, and children ran around without fear, without anxious parents holding them close. Hardly anyone looked twice at the two remaining siblings, and Temari didn't hear any of the low whispering behind her back that she usually hear when Gaara was with them. In place of all that, though, were the _smiles_. Occasionally, in the crowds of the street, someone would notice Temari and Kankurou, someone would recognize them, and they would _smile_ at the two, with this kind, relieved smile that seemed to say _Isn't this great?_ and _I'm so happy for you guys._

If things had been different, if they had been a normal team, if Gaara had been born human and not possessed by Shukaku, they wouldn't have gotten smiles. They would have gotten pitying looks, sad nods of condolences, because they had just lost a teammate and brother. They would have had people reminding them to act like shinobi and deal with death, had people ask if they were okay, and had people give words of comfort and support. If things had been like that, Temari would at least know how to deal, because that was how she was taught, what she would have expected, and she been through this before, first with her mother's death and than her uncle's.

She didn't know how to respond to those smiles, so she ignored them and looked straight ahead, determined to get home and away from all these people.

Kankurou wasn't having any better luck dealing either. Her brother was scowling, glaring at everyone and everything, and his fingers twitched, the puppeteer's version of clenched fists. Temari knew better than to assume it was Gaara's death that would bother him this much; he was pissed at Suna for acting like this right now, much like herself.

"Kankurou, stop that." She hissed at him, because he was losing control of himself.

"Shut up, Temari. I'm not doing anything," He shot back, but his scowl lessened and his fingers stopped twitching. Kankurou gave an annoyed sighed and looked around the street.

"You know," Kankurou began, not looking at Temari. "I just saw this kid, and he was from my class at the academy. Never talked to me before. He's a wimp, and this one time he saw me with Gaara, looked like he almost pissed his pants." Then he grinned, harsh and bitter. "Just then, I saw him, and he grinned at me, like he knew me and we were friends or some crap like that."

The grin turned into a snarl. "_Fucking coward_. I hate people like him." With that, Kankurou shut his mouth and didn't talk for the rest of the way home.

Other kids kept a respectable distance from them because they were the Kazekage's children, and were the best in their age group; they had to be the best. It's because of Gaara, because they were siblings to 'that thing', that other kids completely avoided them and feared them along with Gaara. Shunned by association. Temari went to the Academy for six years and made only two friends; then they became genin and Temari never saw them much anymore, much less was still friends with them.

She didn't know about Kankurou and whether or not he has friends, given all the time he spent with his puppets instead of real people…but he was right. Suddenly Temari and Kankurou were approachable because Gaara was gone, as if now that Gaara was dead, they were _forgiven_ for being siblings to the jinchuuriki and it was okay to make, be friends with the siblings now.

_Fucking coward_

Temari has never felt this much hatred for Suna's inhabitants before. It's more than a little irrational and immature, but she didn't care.

* * *

The celebration was week long. Things went on sale, a third of the village was constantly drunk, amateur puppet plays with titles such as 'The Defeat Of Demon Child Gaara' put on by stupid genin and chuunin performed on the streets (Kankurou once watched from afar, and it was _awful_…the acting was stupid, the characterizations was wrong and so were the events. He should really beat them up for it or something, but he wasn't Gaara and can't go making trouble for no reason), and most Suna shinobi took an unofficial vacation.

The leader of Suna refused to acknowledge the festivities, but quietly tolerated it. Despite a few suggestions from his shinobi, he would not make it an official holiday. The Kazekage seemed to be trying to pretend that Gaara never existed.

Kankurou spent the first two day pissed. Pissed at what, he wasn't too sure. That the whole village was making such a big deal out of Gaara's death, probably. Then he settled into some sort of resignation, because the village did suffered when Gaara was alive and you can't blame them from being relieved.

Kankurou once passed the cemetery and found quite a number of people visiting their dead, who ended up six feet under because of Gaara. That won't happen anymore. There won't ever be any more random killings, any more terror and any more wasting the village's shinobi on those assassination attempts. All good things, even if suddenly, to Kankurou's horror, little kids were everywhere now that parents don't have to worry about a monster hurting their kids and let them run free.

It was for the best interest of everyone that Gaara is gone.

Yet Kankurou can't seem to find and feel the joy everyone else is feeling. He was still living in the mindset that Gaara was still around, still alive. He would see a gust of wind and sand moving along it, and would freeze, glancing around for the little brat, only to remind himself that there was nothing to cause sand to move unnaturally anymore. He would check the calendar and upon seeing that next week was a full moon, would remind himself to do a maintenance check on Karasu and replace the seals in his room, because someone always dies on a night with a full moon, only to realize there's nothing to prepare, nothing to be on guard for anymore.

Gaara wasn't coming back; he was really gone forever now.

_(Vaguely, bordering subconsciously, part of Kankurou would wonder if he was pissed because while the villagers could be so happy, he himself for some reason just can't bring himself to)_

* * *

When Temari was twelve, she, like so many of her classmates, graduated from the Academy. Unlike all the other genin, however, she wasn't placed on a team; instead, she received more training from private tutors. When Kankurou turned graduated from the Academy this year, the same happened to him. They both know why. The reason, as always, was Gaara.

Gaara was a double-edged sword. Even as the Kazekage sent assassins after him, he was still Suna's greatest weapon. He might be terrorizing the villagers, but if war breaks out, he was their trump card. That was what he was created for – the ultimate Shinobi of the Sand. That was what he would have been if he survived to age twelve – given a hitai-ate and made to serve Sunagakure no Sato.

Temari and Kankurou are the only two genin able to form a team with Gaara if he were made genin. Who else could survive? Who else was brave enough? Their individualized training wasn't simply because they were the children of the Kazekage and received the best – it was so they wouldn't be killed by their brother.

But then Gaara died.

Gaara died and no longer do Kankurou and Temari have to wait, so they received another genin to fill the spot Gaara would have taken on their team. They were now a more-or-less normal genin team, expected to perform D- and C-ranked missions and work as a team.

Their new teammate was a fourteen-year-old boy by the name of Hamaji, and both Temari and Kankurou thought he was annoying, useless and arrogant. Hamaji seemed to think he was something important now that he was placed on the same team as the elite Kazekage's children and actually attempted to be team leader since he was the oldest and more experienced.

In their first sparring session, Temari broke his arm in three places, then with her fan and a giant gust of wind, sent him crashing into the wall of a building and broke two of his ribs. He recovered a week later and when he sparred with Kankurou, he got poisoned, deep cuts all over his body and a broken leg. Hamaji got out of the hospital in under a week this time, and now that he knew what his place on the team was, he kept his mouth shut and didn't think he was so awesome any more. As time went on, it also became obvious that Hamaji lagged behind the siblings.

Baki-sensei reprimanded the siblings on their lack of cooperation and teamwork and tried to train Hamaji up to the two's level, and although they did try (Hamaji more than the other two), it was clear that the three didn't work, can't work as a normal genin team. Hamaji was normal enough, but Temari and Kankurou were specifically trained to be placed on the same team as Gaara, to survive and maybe control him to an extent. As nerve-wreaking as being with Gaara was, Temari and Kankurou didn't expect anything less.

They weren't normal and Gaara dying wasn't going to change that.

* * *

A/N: Had a bit of a block, but it's been destroyed now. Huzzah. That's why you guys get two chapters this time. Thanks for reading everyone, especially those that leave reviews. I really appreciate it.

I really wished Kishimoto had shown us more about the Sand Sibs before they went to the Chuunin exams and before Gaara went into Naruto-induced-rehab. It would have been really interesting to see their childhood, together. I think that, even if they were normal and their dad was the Kazekage, Temari and Kankurou suffered some loneliness as well, from their connection to the village monster. Though we can feel sorry for Gaara and Naruto and the other jinchuuriki because we know they are human, the people in the Naruto-universe doesn't. It's like...having a modern-day Hitler clone walking around, and he's been known to cause trouble. The stigma is so bad that anyone near him gets shunned. ...That's what I think, anyways...

tovanell


	6. Chapter 6

Nonexistent Mourning

by tovanell

-AU- An assassination attempt on ten year old Gaara is successful, and Temari and Kankurou mourn for the brother they never really had.

* * *

When Kankurou first found out the Kazekage had targeted Gaara for death, he asked his minder at the time why the hell Gaara was allowed to live with them, to have his own room and be clothed and fed, when it would be more appropriate to throw him out onto the streets, where his chances of survival would decrease? Why was the Kazekage still taking care of Gaara when he wanted the brat dead? It had been two years since Yashamaru's death and Gaara's coming to live with them, and it was hell. Terror was palpable, always, in the household and Gaara wanted it that way, the little bastard.

His minder cuffed his head and called him a fool.

"Gaara isn't stupid. If he can survive attacks from jounin five times his age, he can survive the streets," He said. "Letting him roam the streets, attacking the civilians and stealing food is the last thing we want. The Kazekage wants him dead because he's a threat to the village. Allow him to stay here keeps him always from the civilians and lets us keep an eye on him."

So Gaara stayed at the mansion, getting his own room at the back of the wing. Hardly anyone dared to go near his door.

Until now.

Grumbling and hauling a bucket full of cleaning supplies, Kankurou followed his sister down the hall to the room. It had been three months since Gaara died, but their stupid civilian maids were superstitious and refused to clean out his room, refused to venture down into the lair of the beast. Idiots.

The Kazekage, still wanting to pretend Gaara never existed, didn't want the room left as reminder, and ordered Temari and Kankurou to clean it out. Any belongings he had will receive the same fate as Gaara himself: burned and thrown away.

In front of him, Temari stopped in front of the door and Kankurou stopped right beside her. She gripped the handle and slowly, carefully, pushed the door open.

Kankurou blinked.

He had expected the room to be dark and gloomy, much like Gaara himself. Maybe a bloodstain here or there, or, hell, maybe the walls of the room would be covered with dry blood. The bloodthirsty little psychopath had that horrid blood-soaked gourd, so why not a blood-soaked room?

But no. The walls were plain and the brownish-tan color of most of the buildings of Suna. No blood anywhere, as far as Kankurou could tell. There was hardly anything in the room, just a desk and chair in a corner, and a bookshelf right next to it. Door to what he guessed was the bathroom in one corner, door to the closet in another. No bed, of course.

Sand covered the entire floor of the room, maybe an inch or two deep, perfectly even all over, but it was _Gaara_. Kankurou expected that.

The two siblings stepped into the room, walking carefully through the sand.

"We have the do something about the sand first," Temari muttered, looking back at the footprints she left. "I guess we will just have to carry it out." She glanced down at the bucket she was holding.

"We're going to scoop it out one bucket at a time?" Kankurou scoffed. "Temari, look at all the sand! It'll take forever. And I'm not hauling it back and forth out of the house."

"Let's hear your idea then." She crossed her arms and glared at him.

Kankurou scowled and looked around the room, his eyes landing on the single circular window in the room. It would be so simple if they could just pour the sand out the window, but windows in Suna usually weren't for opening and thick with two panels of glass to withstand the harsh and many sandstorms of the desert.

…

"Let's break the window. Then we can pour the sand out," Kankurou walked over to the window and tapped it with the hand that wasn't holding a bucket. "Or, heck, you can blow the sand out with your fan."

"We're not breaking any windows, Kankurou. Kazekage-sama won't be happy to have to replace it."

"It's just a window. It's cheap and all he has to do is order a carpenter to come fix it. Your plan is just a waste of time and effort."

"The window is closed for a reason. You have at least half a brain; _think_. We break it, sand blows in and we'll have to start over."

He ignored the insult, studying the glass. "They don't predict any sandstorms coming this week. We'll cover it up with a piece of cloth or something and call the carpenter as soon as we're finished cleaning this room. It'll be fine, Temari."

Temari was staring at the window too, mulling over what Kankurou had said. He knows she doesn't want to run around with buckets of sand either, and his idea, although unconventional and likely to get him in trouble (but not _too much_, and that's the important thing), works.

Temari finally shrugs and looks away. "Whatever. This is your idea; you can take the blame for it."

Kankurou grinned and pulled out a kunai. "Get that fan ready, Temari."

* * *

Kankurou held up the cloth with his chakra strings while Temari threw a couple of kunai at it, pinning the cloth to the wall, covering the hole that used to be a window. When they finished with that, they turned their attention to the rest of the room. Kankurou won the rock-paper-scissors used for deciding who the loser that will clean the bathroom will be, and he went to clear out the bookshelf and desk while Temari headed to the bathroom.

Gaara was neat. Or had so little stuff that he couldn't be messy. The bookshelf had a few books and scrolls, informational reading material about chakra control, tactics, history - standard shinobi stuff. There was a box of shuriken, a length of wire and a kunai. It would have been a waste to throw the books and everything away, so Kankurou swiped them for his own use. The desk drawer had a notebook, a few blank scrolls, ink, brushes, and pencils. Kankurou took those too.

It was so bland and impersonal, Gaara's room. One can learn a lot about a shinobi just from his personal effects; what he keeps and buys says a lot about his likes and habits, sometimes even weaknesses to be exploited. Not the case with Gaara. A ninja wouldn't learn anything about him from looking at his room; maybe that he was a simple guy – which in a way, he was – but otherwise nothing.

Kankurou finished emptying the drawer and looked for Temari, but she's still cleaning the bathroom. Grabbing a garbage bag, he decided to clear out the closet as well.

Clothes will be no use for Kankurou, so he ripped them off their hangers and shelves and shoved them into the garbage bag. The small walk-in closet revealed nothing about Gaara as well, except maybe he was partial towards black, but that doesn't mean too much. Simple black shirts, black pants, shemagh, sand shawl – more standard Suna wear.

_Damn, kid really didn't have much interest in anything other than death and carnage,_ Kankurou thought, grimacing. _He was fine with just the gourd and Shukaku. _

Kankurou sighed and continued stuffing clothing into the garbage bag. It didn't matter anymore. Whoever or whatever Gaara was didn't matter anymore. He was gone and dead and there was no point trying to understand him.

_(And they did try to understand, if only so they can predict Gaara's violent moods better and navigate their way around them; if only so they can calm him down and maybe, maybe find something human that remained. _

_But by the time they tried to do so, when Temari and Kankurou realized Gaara will be their future teammate, there was only a demon and they didn't – couldn't – bother try anymore) _

It was when he cleared out the last of the clothing that he noticed it. A wooden box shoved into the far corner of the closet. Kankurou paused, frowning at it. He quickly threw the last article of clothing into the bag and set the bag aside. Crouching down and carefully reaching for the box, he dragged it out to the room.

It was a wooden chest, old and worn with age. The metal lock was jammed with sand, so he would have to pried the lid open to look inside. Kankurou could tell it was well-made, though, and probably had been expensive when it was new and first brought. He stared at it, puzzled. He recognized this chest, strangely, but where…?

"Toy chest," Kankurou murmured, remembering. It was one of Gaara's many toy chests when he was little, he remembered now. Spoiled rotten, Gaara had so many toys – anything he wanted and they were the best ones too. He even got toys imported from other countries. Kankurou remembered being jealous, and peeking into Gaara's room every so often just to stare at myriad of toys there. But that was years ago, when the Kazekage was still hopeful about his experiment and Gaara hadn't gone completely off the deep end yet.

A week after he killed Yashamaru, Gaara also destroyed the wing of the mansion he and Yashamaru lived in back then (though Kankurou founded out a few years later that it was because he was fighting off an assassin). That was why he moved in with them in the first place.

Everything else was destroyed, so why not this old box? What was in it that Gaara would want to keep?

Only one way to found out.

Kankurou pulled out another kunai.

* * *

An old beaten up teddy bear and three broken picture frames. That was what the toy chest contained (And sand, but Gaara got sand everywhere).

Kankurou recognized the teddy bear – how could he not, when Gaara used to drag it around everywhere?

Kankurou lifted it out of the chest and held it in front of him, staring at it. The fur was falling off and it was missing one of its button eyes. He thought Gaara destroyed it, like he did with everything else, after Yashamaru.

Kankurou dropped it back into the box.

He picked up one of the picture frames, careful of the broken glass. The wooden frame was burnt and cracked, but the picture was intact. A picture of their mother.

Kankurou sucked in a breath. _Their mother._

This, unfortunately, brought up bad memories of Gaara and his 'conversations' with Shukaku (at least, Kankurou thought it was Shukaku). It freaked Kankurou out, whenever Gaara, with blood thirst to the extreme and about to completely lose it, began speaking to whatever it was, calling it his mother and all that other shit. He didn't do it regularly or when he was calm, but who knows what the hell went on in that head of his.

That thing was not his mother. Gaara's, maybe, in a way, but not Kankurou's.

Kankurou knew what happens during a sealing, why people like Gaara are called jinchuuriki - the power of human sacrifice. He knew it was his mom, Karura, who was sacrificed, forced to be the container for the vessel, and how her chakra was drained for the sealing, bit by bit, month by month, until she ran out of chakra and died and Gaara was born, possessed by the Ichibi.

Maybe something of her, something of her chakra remained in Gaara; no one was sure, but no way was she responsible for Gaara's blood thirst and insanity, Kankurou was certain. Not his mom, the one who saved him from a fate similar to Gaara's.

Yashamaru had once told Kankurou about how he was almost turned into a jinchuuriki. When Kazekage-sama and the council decided to use Shukaku, Gaara wasn't born yet and their first choice was Kankurou. So it could have been him who was the raging, insane monster, but then his mom stepped in and refused to let them use Kankurou.

But Kazekage-sama wouldn't stop until he had a jinchuuriki for a son, so his mom went and had another kid – Gaara. It cost Karura her life, but she saved Kankurou and he was eternally grateful. Every time he saw Gaara transform and every time he heard about another assassination attempt, he prayed and gave thanks to his mother. And every time he heard Gaara talking to his 'mother', it also kinda pissed him off.

Kankurou set the picture of their mother down carefully on the ground beside him.

He was reaching for the next picture when Temari came out of the bathroom.

"Kankurou, the bathroom's clean. Have you…" She trailed off, puzzled at the sight of the toy chest in front of him. "What is that? What are you doing?"

"I found this at the back of his closet." Kankurou said, picking up another picture frame. This one was one of Gaara, back when his forehead was still unscarred. In the picture he was in front of the Kazekage Dome, teddy bear in hand and looking… sad. Kankurou couldn't remember the last time he saw Gaara looking sad in person. "It's just a few pictures and his old teddy bear."

"Teddy bear? That thing he used to carry around everywhere? I thought he destroyed it, after he killed Yashamaru." Temari walked over and sat down beside Kankurou, peering into the chest.

"Guess he didn't."

"Why would he keep these things though? He wasn't the type of… He didn't care." Temari frowned, picking up the last picture frame left in the chest. This one had Gaara and Yashamaru in it; a smiling Yashamaru crouching down besides a smiling Gaara.

Temari stared at it, eyes clouding over in remembrance.

She took a deep, almost inaudible breath.

"…I forgot he used to smile." She said, voice quiet and flat. "I forgot what he was like, before…before…" She didn't finish.

Kankurou didn't know what to say, so he didn't.

They spent the next few minutes in silence, staring at the pictures in front of them, lost in thoughts or memories or both. Kankurou barely remembered anything of the Gaara that was expressive and half-alright, because they were never close or allowed to be close, and most of the memories he had from then involved both him being angry or jealous of Gaara, or Gaara being angry at him and the sand reacting to his anger. Temari might remember, though, because she was older and always got on a bit better with Gaara than he did.

"Maybe…Maybe there was still something left of him, besides the demon and bloodlust." Kankurou finally said, breaking the silence. He looked at the teddy bear. "Maybe the little kid that dragged this thing around wasn't completely dead yet."

Because who else would keep a teddy bear and a few pictures around? Not the demon obviously, but someone human, someone that wanted to remember and cared.

Kankurou felt very tired, all of a sudden. Tired and agitated and uncomfortable in this room, all at once. He sort of wished he never found the toy chest, wished Gaara stayed completely inhuman and demonic and had destroyed everything like he was supposed to.

He wanted to finish cleaning this room quickly and get the hell out of here, never to come back, and go focus on something else, something more worth his time and kept his mind off Gaara and teddy bears and pictures from a long time ago.

"Too late for that," Temari said. "Too late for anything. Maybe there was, but we'll never found out." She looked down at the picture frame in her hand, then carefully opened it, taking the picture out. After throwing the empty frame into the chest, she swiped the one Kankurou was holding.

"Hey- Temari, what are you doing?" She almost made him cut his finger on the glass, damn it.

"I'm keeping the pictures," Temari said matter-of-factly.

"Why?"

She shrugged. "Because I want to. The same reason Gaara did, probably." Temari now reached for the third one, the one of their mother.

"I don't want to forget."

Kankurou wanted to say something – something like,_ As if we could forget, after everything; _or a tease, like _You're getting soft, Temari_, even if it meant he'll get hurt for it –but Temari had finished taking out the last picture and stood up, putting the three pictures into her pocket.

"Come on," she said, looking down at Kankurou, back to her no-sense self. "We have to finish. You throw away the trash - and don't forget the bag in the bathroom - and I'll go call for a carpenter for the broken window." And with that, she walked out of the room, leaving Kankurou alone.

Kankurou looked at the teddy bear again, one last time.

_-Too late for anything-_

Letting out an annoyed sigh, he closed the lid of the wooden chest and went to do what his sister ordered him to do.

* * *

A/N: Ah, now we have some, albeit repressed, emotions/regrets from Temari and Kankurou. Or at least I hoped I showed it well. I didn't want to identify the emotions, the sadness, straightforwardly. No 'He was sad', but instead, it's implied, because two are feeling it, but refusing to identify it.

You mentioned the scar, **XHugsOKisses, **and no, I don't think they know the story behind it, but I don't plan on them finding out either. It comes back to Yashamaru and I doubt Gaara will ever reveal that incident to anyone. Temari and Kankurou probably thought Gaara just killed Yashamaru for the heck of it, and Gaara let them believed that. Daddy Kazekage most likely won't say anything either.

Now, a question: the toy chest. Think I might have made Gaara a bit OOC to have him keep the toy chest? I myself don't think so, because I think there was still a bit of the sweet, teary-eyed kid inside of him. That still cling to some hope, because how else would he have changed so much after one fight with Naruto? That part of him that couldn't destroy the toy chest, kept it, but shoved it away, out of sight, out of mind.

Also, recently, in the manga, it was revealed that jinchuuriki were usually close blood relatives of the Kage. When I read that, I was like, ohshi-, because that meant Temari and Kankurou might have had been in danger of having Shukaku shoved into them. Interesting thought, and I wanted to include my thoughts somewhere here. Who knows? Maybe I might make another AU fic that explores that possibility...

Looking forward to constructive criticism and/or just reviews.

tovanell


	7. Chapter 7

Nonexistent Mourning

by tovanell

-AU- An assassination attempt on ten year old Gaara is successful, and Temari and Kankurou mourn for the brother they never really had.

* * *

Temari's bookcase was mostly filled with books and scrolls on various jutsu, with a few history books, a few botany books, and one small photo album her mother used to keep. In that photo album were only pictures of toddler-aged Temari and Kankurou, of their much younger and happier parents, of the time before her mother died and Gaara was born.

(There were few pictures taken of Temari and Kankurou, much less of the whole family, after Gaara's birth.)

At the back of that photo album is stuffed the three pictures they had found in Gaara's room. Temari and Kankurou never took them out, never looked at the pictures after that day, but the pictures were still there, nevertheless. They were there, as the Kazekage got rid of the last traces of his mistakes and made it seemed they never happened, and as most of Suna eventually forgot the monster that walked their streets.

Temari and Kankurou did not forget, though, and that was the closest to a remembrance and funeral they could – and were willing – to give Gaara.

* * *

Time passed.

* * *

Gaara was gone, and it seemed a lot of Suna's problems and bad luck went with him. Morale rose and so did the number of shinobi in Suna. The more than satisfactory job Gaara did with the extermination of the steppe nomads got Suna the Wind Daimyo's approval and a few more missions.

And when Konohagakure no Sato, the Village Hidden in the Leaves, was attacked and half destroyed by Orochimaru and his allied forces of the Sound and Waterfall Villages, Suna received even more missions and their funding back once Konoha was seen as weak by the Wind daimyo. Plus, as Konoha's allies, Suna helped with the rebuilding, and Konoha was indebted to them.

_(How happy the Kazekage was, seeing the village that caused had Suna so much trouble, that caused him to create Gaara and all the misfortune the boy brought, weak and depending on _their_ help) _

Temari at thirteen became chuunin, on her first try at the exam. Less than a year after that, she was leading her own teams and on her way to becoming jounin. She was promoted to jounin at age fifteen.

Kankurou failed his exam the first time, trained like crazy, trained until he can use two puppets, Karasu and Kuroari, and finally became chuunin a year later at his second exam. At sixteen, he was jounin and the second best puppeteer in Sunagakure after (old Chiyo still held the title of number one, no matter how senile and inactive she was).

Then, when the mysterious organization Akatsuki began growing prominent and threatening the Five Great Shinobi Nations, the two met Uzumaki Naruto.

* * *

...

* * *

When a Jinchuuriki dies, the bijuu sealed in him or her dies as well, but isn't quite gone forever. As a being of pure chakra, it's naturally revived a few years later, in its natural environment, though weaken and not a threat for a few more years, when it regains enough strength to be able to attack villages again.

Gaara died six years ago. It was very likely that Shukaku had materialized again, somewhere in the desert, but weak and hiding. The terrorist organization Akatsuki, who was apparently trying to gathering up the nine bijuu, the nine tailed beasts for most likely nefarious reasons, was surely looking for it. It was in the best interest of both the Leaf and Sand to find Shukaku, seal it and guard it before the Akatsuki gets their hands on it.

Because of that, tons of letters were sent back and forth from the Kazekage to the Hokage, until they reached an agreement to have a team from each of their villages go on a joint mission to look for the Ichibi, Shukaku, capture it, seal it and have Suna guard it. With only three of the nine bijuu left, it was important Shukaku does not get taken as well.

As former siblings of the Ichibi jinchuuriki, and therefore most familiar with Shukaku (unfortunately), Temari and Kankurou got roped into the joint mission. With them were their former sensei, Baki, who was also familiar with Shukaku, and Chiyo, the most experienced seal expert in Suna, persuaded to come along after being told her grandson Sasori was part of the Akatsuki duo looking for the Ichibi. Also along for the trip were two other teams of jounin and chuunin.

"I wish we knew about all this before we killed Gaara." Kankurou muttered to Temari as they sat in Kankurou's room, polishing and preparing their weapons for mission. "Then maybe we wouldn't have to go combing the desert for that damn Shukaku for the next few weeks."

"What would we have done with an alive Gaara?" Temari asked. "At the rate he was going, he would have lost it completely one day and destroyed everything. You know how he hated the village."

Kankurou snorted. "The 'I exist to kill everyone' bullshit; yeah, I remember. I meant we could have extracted the bijuu, kept it nicely sealed in its pot and not have to go through all this. I don't even know how the hell we'll take on the whole Shukaku – Gaara was hard enough to kill as it is."

"They say a bijuu is weaker without a human host. Less intelligence, or something. In any case, Kazekage-sama told us that the Leaf has agreed to send shinobi that can deal with this type of thing."

"Maybe they'll send their own jinchuuriki. Konoha has the kyuubi, doesn't it?"

"They wouldn't send a jinchuuriki when it is jinchuuriki the Akatsuki are looking for." Temari replied flatly.

She sighed. "I don't know how you made jounin – you're still such an idiot."

"An idiot wouldn't have made Head Puppeteer at sixteen, would he?" He retorted. "You're just too smart for your own good."

"You're right. You're not an idiot; you're just a puppet geek." Temari smiled a little.

After Gaara, after the tension and each-person-for-themselves mentality, they have grown closer. Not teammates that have to put up with Suna's jinchuuriki – but brother and sister.

_(But both of them know – in the best scenario, it would have been two brothers and a sister) _

Kankurou did not reply. There was silence, until he asked, "He's better off dead, isn't he?"

If they could talk about him like this, talk about Gaara's life like a thing that did not matter, then…

Temari's voice was utterly devoid of emotion. "Probably."

* * *

Turned out, Kankurou was right. Konoha did send their jinchuuriki, a blonde loudmouth named Uzumaki Naruto. With him was his team leader, the (in)famous Hakate Kakashi, a jounin called Yamato, a medic-nin named Haruno Sakura, and _the_ Uchiha Sasuke.

The Suna group all had found out when Naruto decided to punch a chuunin right in the face after the chuunin had given his opinion about the decreased _monster_ and _good riddance he's gone_ during a debriefing.

"Naruto!" Pink-haired _(How the hell is that possible, Kankurou had thought the first time he saw her)_ Sakura had hissed. "You can't go around attacking our allies!"

"He– He–" the blond struggled uselessly against Kakashi's grip, angrily pointing at the chuunin who was currently nursing a broken nose. "That bastard shouldn't talk about him that way!"

"Why the hell do you care?" One of the Sand jounin sneered. "He's right. It's a good thing that _thing_ dead."

"You…!"

"Unless…you're just like him?" The jounin continued. Naruto's threatening growl was all the answer he needed. The man laughed bitterly. "What's this? Some kind of demon kinship? You're a monster just like him!"

"I'll kill you-!"

Then the Uchiha was behind the man, a kunai pressed against his throat. "Don't talk about my teammate like that." He said quietly.

And it all would have gone down the toilet, both the mission and relationship between the two villages, if weren't for, surprisingly, Chiyo-baa-sama who told everyone she was sick of their bickering, and they all should move their asses because she was looking forward to seeing her cute grandson again and then going home to finish her retirement after all this. Then she took off into the desert by herself, making everyone fall into a frenzy trying to catch up with her.

Kankurou was stunned. The blond brat, a jinchuuriki? The kid, who was about his age, if not a year or two younger (_the same age Gaara would have been)_ was immature, loud and completely different from their own jinchuuriki in almost every way. The rising bloodlust when he was angry, though, was familiar. Still, before the Chuunin's remark, Naruto was all smiles and eagerness and totally not-Gaara.

And, Kankurou thought, remembering the way the Uchiha came to his friend's defense, he had people that cared, that thought of him more than a demon host.

Sneaking a glance at Temari, he caught her staring at the blonde as well, a slightly confused look on her face. No doubt she was thinking the same as he was.

What the hell happened with this guy?

* * *

**ooo**

* * *

A/N: Early Action College Applications are done! Which meant working on this fic after neglecting it for so long.

I totally had not planned for Naruto and company to show up. What I had came up with originally was an angsty epilogue chapter. But I forgot my original plan after having my brain turned into mush after college essays, and this new idea popped up. It's probably going to span several more chapter, instead of the one last chapter I planned to do at the start. I like it.

So, Gaara's dead and his death caused a completely different timeline. This is what I thought might have happened:

Suna, without their jinchuuriki, was completely ignored by Orochimaru, who needed a monster to go berserk in the streets of Konoha and destroy it. The Kazekage survives. Orochimaru instead chooses Takigakure, the Hidden Village of the Waterfall, which has its own jinchuuriki - **Fuu**, host of the seven-tailed horned beetle. Offer some power here, kill the village leader there, and he's got Takigakure to back his invasion up.

Chuunin exams starts. Sasuke gets cursed mark, as usual. But the main difference is that Gaara isn't there to stalk Sasuke. This causes Kakashi **not** to teach Sasuke the Chidori to fight Gaara. The other opponents are pretty normal people, so honing his Sharingan and other skills were enough. Without needing to teach Sasuke the individual-training-needed-and-time-consuming Chidori, Naruto also gets trained by Kakashi. Later, the two boys meets Jiraiya and he trains them both (kinda) as well.

Invasion starts, and Sasuke and Naruto work together, as well as the other members of the Konoha 12, to take down Fuu. They succeed in defeating and capturing Fuu, who Naruto being Naruto later makes friends with. See, in this world, Naruto and Sasuke are on much better terms with each other. Sasuke isn't unhealthy jealous of Naruto's vast improvement and sees him as an equal.

Itachi stills comes by, and Sasuke goes off the deep end, but Naruto is able to talk, and beat, some sense into him and brings him back. It helps, of course, that Sasuke doesn't know the Chidori.

Team 7 is intact, Akatsuki is running amok; Fuu's dead, Naruto's pissed, and wanting to stop the Akatsuki in any way possible. This leads to everyone looking for the Shukaku, whose jinchuuriki was killed and now has materialized somewhere in the big desert. Leading to the meeting between Naruto and the rest of the Sand Sibs, and Naruto being Naruto will somehow make them realize they had loved Gaara. Or something.

You're going to have to read more to find out how.

(I tried to fit all this into the story. I _tried_. But it just didn't fit with the narration and the hints I drop just weren't enough. So, info dump)

tovanell


End file.
